Tag Archive for Body Mutilation

Netflix Instant Watch: the Human Centipede 2

The Human Centipede 2

Hello again OMGJ readers — or at least whoever has stuck around during the less-than-active first half of 2012.   If we’re going to keep this site open, then I’m bringing back Netflix Friday — a chance for me to write about movies without doing a 5,000 word scene-by-scene breakdown that in the past had caused me to lose my mind and light my belongings on fire.

Supermarket Noodle Bowls: Don’t Buy Them

So lately I’ve been trying to find something that I can eat for lunch at work that doesn’t come out of that part of the frozen meal section that oh so many middle aged women huddle around at your local supermarket. While those frozen meals are generally OK, I find myself slowly spiralling into depression more and more with every microwave thawing of one. I have no idea why. Maybe because it makes me sad that I would much rather be eating Spaghettios straight out of the can than sitting there deciding if I would rather get another frozen brick of French Mushroom Italian Delight Panini, or Italian Lobster Fish Fart Bake. At least Spaghettios have a taste. They taste like Spaghettios. All of that frozen stuff just tastes like microwave radiation. No matter how many fancy ingredients you claim are in it.

Insane Medical Practices

medtop2

Strange medical practices fascinate me. Not only are most absolutely ridiculous, but also knowing that many were in wide use at some point is just mind blowing. To see that such crazy assed shit was considered the de facto way to cure illnesses at one point is almost frightening. Medicine is an evolving art, and nowhere do you get more appreciation for that than by taking a look into the past, which is exactly what we’re gonna do today.

Below are a few practices and experiments that the medical community has tried, and ultimately failed with. None of these ideas were ever good (even at the time), but at least it shows there are more than a few doctors were willing to go all mad scientist on our asses to help the future.

So let’s do some learnin’!

MakeOutClub Aborted Site Review

I originally wrote this in 2003 or 2004, back when I was able to feel disgust at the hipsters of the time, which seem to be exactly like the hipsters of today, actually.  When we rediscovered this on the wayback machine, all of the images were lost, so I have had to go back to MOC – WHICH STILL EXISTS – and harvest new, modern images.  This was a tragedy for me.  But the real tragedy is that the people I originally reviewed are probably all the people who now run blogs about home decorating and/or quirky food and raise ugly children with stupid names.  Enjoy if you can!

Aborted Site Review: Zetacreations

Welcome back to 2002!  In an effort to offer all of our classic articles, both good and… not-as-good, we are putting these old things back up.  When they are as old as this one though, we feel that we must make it really known that this was not written anytime recently.  We no longer feel as terrified about sites like this.  We really don’t care anymore.  BUT WE DID ONCE, and why bury that fact in the past?  So, here we go.

The site we will be looking at today deals in making marital aids. But not just any marital aids. No, if that were the case then this would be a fairly meaningless article, as I’m sure most of you are already the owner of several large marital aids, with the sole purpose of owning them being hiding them in your sibling’s birthday cakes as a special “surprise.” The marital aids we are speaking of today are not the every day dildos we have come to know and love over the years. The dildos we are speaking of are, in fact, replicas of male animal reproductive organs. Or for those of you that did not graduate fourth grade, and sometimes find yourself trying to fit yourself into the washing machines at laundromats: animal cocks.

Guide to Fetishes

capture2

There was once a time in America when sex was considered quite the taboo subject. This of course, was mostly during the 50′s through the 60′s. A time many people consider America at its most innocent, and in many more people’s opinion its most boring. During those twenty or so years, America went through a time when it was considered truly horrible to even mention anything that remotely had to do with sex. Close intimate relationships were frowned upon, and many husbands and wives slept in separate beds. Except maybe on those rare occasions when they were both feeling “frisky,” and would get their groove on by going in the living room and watching I Love Lucy until they weren’t feeling those oh-so-evil sexual urges anymore, and then went back to bed.